You will never know just how hard it is to be away from you on this day. This is my third Thanksgiving away from you. This is my third Thanksgiving not waking up to mom singing along to her Pandora station while preparing her contributions to the Thanksgiving feast. This is my third Thanksgiving not wandering downstairs still in my pjs to watch the Macy’s Thanksgiving Day Parade and gawk at the Rockettes’ perfection. My third Thanksgiving not going to Aunt Valerie and Uncle Mike’s house for dinner. Not getting happy drunk off of wine while I watch my cousins play video games that I don’t understand. Not playing ping pong and laughing until we cry. Not sitting at the glorified kids table and making fun of our parents while we quite literally stuff our faces with an unhealthy amount of stuffing. Not being full at the end of the night in every sense of the word. Not watching Ali fall asleep absurdly early (she’s probably asleep right now) from all the tryptophan. Not listening to Christmas music on our way home. This is my third Thanksgiving unable to hug my most dear loved ones.
I know you know, but since I can’t be with you on one of our favorite days of the year, I want to let you know how much I am thinking of you, and how thankful I am every day that I was born into this family.
Mom and Dad, I’m so thankful for who you are as human beings and that you met while dinosaurs roamed the earth and fell in love all those years ago. Hehe. Dad, I’m thankful you kept pursuing Mom even though she showed zero signs of reciprocation at first. Mom, I’m so thankful that you accepted Dad’s proposal, even though it was really “shitty.” (HAHAHA inside joke!) And above all, after five years of marriage seemed to go well, I’m so thankful you decided to grow your little family. Growing up as your child alongside Ryan was the best gift I have ever received. I am so thankful for all the values you have instilled in me, and all the lessons you’ve taught me, even if I hated you for it at the time. You have shaped Ryan and I into two fully formed whole people, and any time either of you doubt yourselves as parents, know that I never do.
Ryan, I’m very thankful for our relationship throughout our childhood, because you were my first lesson in unconditional love. I know when we were kids there were definitely times you thought I didn’t care about you, or like you, or that you weren’t as important, and I want you to know I’m sorry for if you ever still have those thoughts, and how wrong you are. When you were born I was the happiest toddler in America. Know that no matter how difficult our relationship was while we were growing up, I always loved and cared about you, and I was and aways will be the first to defend you if need be. I’m thankful for our love of Friends, and for our love of New York sports, and pizza, and Disney, and Harry Potter, and making fun of Mom and Dad. I’m thankful to have had a frenemy in you throughout my life.
And to the rest of my family: I am unbelievably grateful for you. You all make me so proud to be a part of this family. You love me when I need it most, you support me through everything, and you are there for me for whatever I need. We are crazy, dysfunctional, and all the other adjectives people use to describe their families, but with us there is such a strong base of pure love connecting us, that even when we're not together I never feel far from you. I truly feel like the luckiest girl in the world to have you all, and if I were there right now I'd be three glasses of wine in squeezing you and giving you all smooches.
So know that while it kills me that I’m not with you today, I appreciate you more than you will ever know. Thank you for being my support system, thank you for being my biggest fans, and thank you for sending me pictures of Ali asleep on Thanksgiving when you know I wish I were snapchatting it myself.
Give kisses to Ali, Tyler, Nicole, Rosie, Aunt Val, Uncle Mike, Aunt Lois, and Uncle Willy for me. I love you all, and Happy Thanksgiving.