Here we are, at the last day of 2017. I'm sure this year represented different things for every person, but I assume we can all agree that as a nation, 2017 might actually be one for the books. Like when our kids have kids and they're in US history, I wouldn't be surprised if they were reading about some of the SHIT that went down this year.
I'm not one for "New Years Resolutions." I just like to look at the year as a whole that is passing, and the year as a whole that is coming, and decide what stays and what goes. What habits die with the passing year, which people not to take into the new year? What happened in the last year that I'm proud of? What am I not proud of? Things like that.
2017 for me was huge. At the start of 2017 I made a promise to myself that this would be the year that separates my past from my future. When I become a woman and my dreams have come true, I will be able to look back at 2017 and know that that's when everything changed for me. I think it's pretty safe to say I was right.
My 2017 included:
Finally moving into my first LA apartment
Beginning working for Home Free
Enrolling FINALLY in an acting class that I LOVE
Buying a brand new car
Getting a kitty!
Saying goodbye to someone I loved when I knew my heart wasn't being taken cared of
Going on tons of unforgettable trips
Booking and filming my first short film!!!!
It was a truly outstanding year for me. A lot of highs, a lot of lows, and some of the biggest life changes that I've come across. Some years, when you look back on them, are hard to remember. This will not be one of them. But of course, with a year as outstanding as 2017 has been for me, come a lot of lessons. So I figured I'd jot down some of them here. 17 things I've learned in 2017. Now, I'm not totally clear on whether I learned all of these things for sure in 2017, but they are 17 things I know to be true, so go with me.
17. Cats are way better animals than I ever gave them credit for.
I used to think they were just bitchy, lazy animals who were plotting your murder, but now that there is a little furry friend running around our apartment, I have come to understand that cats are funny, complex, and really fucking cute. LOOK AT THAT FACE! She might still be plotting my murder, but she's cute so.
16. Be financially responsible.
It's not cute to not understand how to budget. If you don't know how much money is in your account, you probably shouldn't be buying those shoes and then asking mom and dad for help. Keep records. Stay on top of your shit. You'll save a lot of money that way.
15. Be the kind of friend you want.
Take some time, think about the kind of friends you want surrounding you. Think about times that a friend has upset you; don't repeat it. Be the kind of friend you'd want for yourself, and ask for nothing in return.
14. Adjust your expectations.
Your friends are not you. Every human has different strengths and different weaknesses. When faced with a situation, every human reacts differently. You can't expect people to behave the way you would. If you can't accept that you'd better make a lot of money so you can make yourself a group of friends out of your own clones. Accept and embrace what is different, and you'll be a lot less disappointed, and there'll be a lot less friction in your relationships.
13. Family is the most important thing.
Whatever kind of family you come from, they are the first people who knew you and loved you. Whether there is bad blood or good, it made you who you are today. When all else is gone, your family is there. There is no bond like it. Make sure to take care of those who have taken care of you.
12. Do not fear instability.
If your routine is holding you back from something you desire, do not be afraid of a little instability. No one you look up to in this world ever got anywhere by avoiding risk and watching life pass by. If you are putting the energy out into the world to achieve something, you will achieve it. But you have to try.
11. Read more.
It's good for you. Put down the cell. Put down the remote. Light a candle, make tea, and read a few chapters. It's quite healing for the soul and quite expanding for the mind.
10. Try new things, no matter your age.
Did you know you can learn a language for free using an app? (It's called Duolingo, I use it all the time and I'm almost 50% fluent in Italian FOR FREE.) Don't get caught up in thinking you're too old to learn or try something new. Pick up a guitar, learn some chords. Learn how to cook, for fucks sake, learn how to cook. It's not cute to have no hobbies or skills, and it's never too late to take up something new.
9. Right and wrong isn't as black and white as we used to think.
Even the worst people have backstories, and even the best people have secrets. The older we get, the harder it is to determine the right choice. That’s because there is no right choice, morally. We are who we are and we make the choices that we make and deal with what comes next. That's life. And it's chaotic and messy, but it's a perfect chaos. We have the luxury and the power to create our own destiny, and every choice takes us one step further on our perspective paths.
8. Regret is wasted energy.
If you don’t like a choice you made, you can change it. If it’s in the past and you can’t change it, well what the hell are you doing focusing on that instead of what’s going on right now? Learn from it. Grow. Become a more well-rounded and wiser person. If we all made every decision correctly, we'd be a bunch of Stepford Wives walking around with no immunity to rejection. It'd be boring, and it'd be pointless.
7. Know the difference between alone and lonely.
There is a huge difference between the two. If you can't tell the two apart, you need some learning in the art of being alone. Learn to love time by yourself. You are all you have at the end of day. If you can't tolerate hanging out with yourself, how do you expect others to?
6. Don't make excuses.
It helps no one. Most people can see right through them, and you're only holding yourself back. Don't let your ego be the reason you don't achieve everything you deserve.
5. LISTEN TO ONE ANOTHER.
Do your research before you open up your big mouth about subjects you know nothing about. Read opposing arguments. Don’t just fill your head with one side of things. That’s ignorance. Learn to tolerate people who are different than you and respect their opinions. That’s where change comes from.
4. Clean your room.
Just do it. You'll be happier, I promise. This is coming from a girl who used to not be able to see her floor. A messy room breeds a messy mind. Turn on your favorite album and just clean the damn room. You'll be so thankful to yourself that you did, and you'll be so much more productive. Your bedroom should be the place you escape to. You should love being inside your bedroom. It should be the place that you unwind and relax in. How can you unwind and relax amongst piles of clutter? You can't. Clean the room.
3. Support your friends. Support your friends. Support your friends. Support your friends. Support your friends.
I can't stress this enough. Who wants an unsupportive friend? If you can't support your friends, you don't deserve your friends' support. Applaud their successes, comfort them when they're down. Don't compare yourself. Be the friend you would want for yourself.
2. Eat whatever the fuck way you want to.
But don't be an idiot about it. Be balanced. Be indulgent, but not gluttonous. Understand the consequences. Be mindful of what you put into your body, because the way you treat your body is the way your body will treat you.
1. If you love someone, tell them.
We've heard it said a million times, but we seldom listen to it. We generally wait until the other says it first. Brave are the souls who put themselves out there and say it first. But guess what, I did it this year, and I didn't die. And guess what else: I said it first and he didn't say it back, and I still didn't die! In fact, being so vulnerable set me free. I'm not going to say it's not painful to be rejected. It fucking is. But how liberating to know that you did something so many are afraid of and life keeps on going. All that changes is that you're not holding back anymore and you're able to live freely. Your heart tends to know things before your brain does. It's a confusing concept. But just like Cascada sung all those years ago, listen to your heart. Your heart's the one without ego, so pay attention to it, and follow it.
Well guys! That's it for my last blog post of 2017! I'm going to be spending my day curating a vision board for 2018. 2017, be it a not so great year in US history, was an incredible year for me. So many challenges, so many obstacles, and so much growth. I'm proud of me this year, and I'm going to do my best to chase this feeling into the new year. May 2018 be the year that sets your past apart from your future. Thank you for reading post after post. I can't wait for all this next year has in store!
Be safe tonight you beautiful people!
Happy New Year!
XO